I spent Thursday afternoon lunching at the most exclusive spot in DC: Club MD (a.k.a. The GW Hospital Cafeteria). You can tell it's a hospital because they snuck a lemon into my taco salad. They'll get you those vitamins any way they can, whether you're an in-patient or just visiting.

Improv Everywhere

I wouldn't be a good disseminator of interesting information if I didn't mention Improv Everywhere. They recently arranged some fun in a Los Angeles Mall. At the food court, 16 undercover "agents" create a musical moment by breaking out in song.

Burb Life: Adventures Not in the District (B.L.A.N.D.)

Part 1 of a my 435 part series, exploring the differences between Washington DC and its suburbs.

In Washington DC: A full-sized animal on the loose means your conscience is about to be tested.
































In Arlington: A full-sized animal on the loose means . . .

wave, there's a sale at the Staples.

Google Image Labeler: Do Your Part

I know many of you are out there saying, "Darn, I missed World Water Day yesterday. Now I have no way of lending my assistance to a worthy cause. I'm especially in trouble because I hate leaving the house, and I only contribute my time to worthy causes if I can do it over the Internet." That is what you're saying, right?

Well, you lazy philanthropists, there's a cause out there that requires no money down, and no legs down either (i.e. don't get up). Google, the champion of Don't Be Evil, is calling on you to help them out. (and, by helping Google, you help us all.)

They are currently in the process of indexing every single bit of information in the whole wide world. Hard to believe that they would need some help. But they do.

If you love using Google Image Search, but always thought it could be more accurate, well, now you can make that a reality. Surf over to the Google Image Labeler. It's simple. Once you begin, you are shown a series images. You enter words to describe the images (word association!). If the random person who is simultaneously describing the images matches one of your words, then bingo, Google uses that descriptive word to make their searches better.

It's faster than open-heart surgery and more fun that playing Frogger. Try it. It'll make you feel better.

disclaimer: using Google Image Labeler should not be used as moral compensation for not giving to actual charities.

Genius

I'll say this on the record (first time in a while I could say that), if any television show can accurately caricature the $25,000 Pyramid as well as the clip below, attention must be paid.

TBD

New Adventures commencing shortly . . .
Please enjoy the music while packing begins, the fuel tank is filled, and GPS is programmed.

It snows a lot here in Ohio. It adds to the doldrums that actually give this area a nice feeling. It must be the consistency. I'd rather have it always be doldrummy than in some indecisive state where you can't define your locale.

Ur-in Massillon

It's a privilege here in Massillon.

Why I Should Have Stayed in Iowa Longer

My biggest regret from my Iowa experience: No free sandwich.

Denver Airport

More airports should include canned jazz and concise instructions. It really gets your visit (or departure) off on the right foot.

Bye, Colorado. This looks like the right gate. Assuming the Rockies are at my back once we take off, I can feel confident I am going in the right direction.

He Went <<< >>> way

It took me until now to realize that street signs derive much of their authority from what they're mounted on. Welded to steel girders above the highway? Great. On a metal post at the end of your street? Very good. Nailed to two trees? Reach for the GPS.

Thanks for the help in this realization, Nederland.

In Colorado, the animals show you the way. Cows in Iowa should take notes.

Nederland

I'm off to the town of Nederland, CO for a day's work. Nederland is Dutch for "Netherlands" And, by the inverse property, Netherlands is English for "Nederland."

I'm posting for two reasons. One, to share the joy with you. Two, so you know my last whereabouts. Nederland is a . . . special place, so I just want to make sure I keep tabs on myself in case I get lost up there. For example, thanks to the discovery of a Frozen Dead Guy, they now celebrate Frozen Dead Guy Days (check your local listings). Maybe I'll get to meet him.

Snow? In Colorado? This wasn't in the brochure. Pretty soon they'll be saying you can ski here.

Corner Office

A office with a view. Not bad. Also, furniture is for suckers.

I suppose this proves I am in Atlanta. But you can't see the date, so I guess you'll just have to take my word that I didn't time travel during the flight.

Solidarity, Brother

Rocky Mountain High

For the past 7 months, you've been one step behind. I bounce around from city to city, state to state . . . then something happens . . . then I write about it.

This time, I'm fortunate to have some forewarning. On Tuesday, I'll be heading off to Colorado for a week. Again, for reasons of national security, I have to be vague about my purpose. But if you've got friends in Boulder, or know the best places to visit, feel free to pass them along.

Also, my plane flies through Atlanta. It's a strange route, but I can only imagine the sharp right hand turn when we hit Georgia produces some sort of slingshot effect, increasing our speed, and making it faster than if we had just flown as the crow flies. Also, flying as the crow logically seems to increase the chances of a crow flying into the engine. And with Lost premiering shortly, I don't want to take any chances.

Because some people think video is the only documentary device . . .

Cell phone quality

Ready to roll

Cousin Jacob

Community Service

A Familiar Scene

Withdrawal is a powerful force. Think back to Iowa, and what was the one guaranteed event . . . PARADES. That's why I am in Lambertville today. It's the Winter Festival Parade. Any minute now, the infantry will arrive over that bridge from New Hope, PA, the sister city.

The Garden State

New Jersey: We got yer ornate right here

Home State Advantage

I returned abruptly to NJ today. I did not blog the trip home (as I had on the way out) because of my experiences in Nevada. I spent many an hour on the "The Loneliest Road in America." The name is not misleading. I had to use every waking fiber of my being to keep my attention on the road. The monotony of the scenery and the lack of any other vehicles did a number on me. After that, I resolved that any future driving would only include 100% concentration, audio books, and Dr. Pepper. For safety reasons, blogging took a back seat. And soon, after realizing I couldn't blog from the back seat while also driving, I desisted all together.

My return home was met with quite a few surprises. My room was as I had left it, but there were new additions to the family. One is featured prominently below. The other two are a flat-panel TV and a pellet stove. Which once again proves my theory . . . parents will replace their kids with merchandise or canines at the first chance they get.

This reminds me of my junior year of high school, when I took an overnight school field trip to Minnesota. I returned home to find a new washer/dryer upstairs and my desk lamp replaced with an arctic fox. The next day, they were gone, like my parents thought I just wouldn't notice. But I did.

Glad to be back.

West Des Moines?

Funny thing happens if you forget to turn off of I-80 in Iowa and keep driving for two days.

There are clever people all over this country.

Pack those bags . . . I'm headed for Iowa!

I was in Sioux City. Now I am in Des Moines.

Perhaps it's my love of towns that have two names.

Perhaps it's my geographic detachment issues. (I'm working those out. It's a long road to recovery).

Either way, I'm in Des Moines, Iowa. Plenty of new things to sites to take in. And since I'm in an urban area, this will be an interesting contrast with the style of adventures in the Greater Meriden-Marcus-Cleghorn area in Cherokee, Iowa.

Apartment . . . Lesson

I am without my laptop due to technical troubles. So I won't be able to edit a video. But I can still hijack library computers for writing purposes. (If anybody at the library asks, I am doing a research paper on the effects of the White Tailed Deer Migration Across New Jersey on the 2010 off-year down-ballot elections.)

I'd like to do a final apartment guide, but it will be a shrunk-down version. An Apartment Guidelette. Below you will see the proper way to empty a refrigerator of liquids. I'd like to thank my roommate for providing most of the items that needed to be removed. I'll admit, the last one is mine.

The best part about emptying out a fridge is you get to fulfill that childhood dream we all share . . . . pretending you're a policeman during Prohibition. I can remember countless times under the old oak tree wishing I could have been alive during the first part of the century so I too could pour alcohol down a drain with reckless abandonment. Thanks, Iowa!
















I'd perfected my form by the second bottle.
















Ol' Fridgy threw me a curveball with this funny shaped potent potable. I struggled at first with this box . . .
















Until I realized Box was only a bag in disguise. Easy pouring from that point forward.

















I even had to pour out the prune juice to prove to myself this wasn't some vendetta against wines and spirits.
















"I said son can you play me a memory, I'm not really sure how it goes. But I'm pretty sure it's about me wallowing over my predictability, as I cried over spilling out milk." -- Billy Joel
















The End.

Like a Phoenix

I feel like I've just awoke from a 14-day ethanol induced coma (the best kind of coma, by the way, because it reduces our dependence upon foreign comas). Back to blogging . . .

And now a message from our sponsors.

Friends may come and go, but Nuvi has always been here (telling me to go there).

One of these is the current temperature. (Here's a hint: It's not eight hundred and twelve degrees outside. Not even in celsius)

Stop. Pay Toll.

Sliding on my bum in a winter wonderland

Color? Neh.

Building Settlements on the Moon

The Road Map to Peace goes through Iowa

I am cold in Iowa.

It flurried in Iowa

It snowed in New Jersey.

Thanksgiving Greetings

It's never good practice to send readers away from your site. But sometimes other sites do things yours can't. So please, head on over to the link below to see all the exciting people I've been meeting out here.

Curtis's Annual Thanksgiving Greeting

Michael Scott

Why post an entire episode of "The Office"? Because, thanks to Hulu.com . . . I can

Welcome to the West

You ain't a small town in Iowa if you don't have a Pizza Ranch. Therefore, Akron is a town. I've never been at one for dinner until now. Apparently they have a menu when there is no lunch buffet. Good to know if you're a hungry cowboy on the ranch.

Out of Place

A 4 point buck in full stride in urban Des Moines

You should have seen the cow

It's milk that tastes like a root beer float. I'd call it an Iowa treat, except It's from a Nebraskan organic farm.

Pointing the Camera Skywards

Pink sky in the morning, sailor's warning. Pink sky at night, take a photo for your blog.

When I first crossed the border in June, I noticed the sky seems to be bigger here in Iowa. Perhaps using DC as a point of reference is not a good comparison. But even months later, I still enjoy taking time midday to look upward.

? o'lantern

When you can't beat 'em, co-opt the holiday as your own. -- Yogi Berra