Apartment . . . Lesson

I am without my laptop due to technical troubles. So I won't be able to edit a video. But I can still hijack library computers for writing purposes. (If anybody at the library asks, I am doing a research paper on the effects of the White Tailed Deer Migration Across New Jersey on the 2010 off-year down-ballot elections.)

I'd like to do a final apartment guide, but it will be a shrunk-down version. An Apartment Guidelette. Below you will see the proper way to empty a refrigerator of liquids. I'd like to thank my roommate for providing most of the items that needed to be removed. I'll admit, the last one is mine.

The best part about emptying out a fridge is you get to fulfill that childhood dream we all share . . . . pretending you're a policeman during Prohibition. I can remember countless times under the old oak tree wishing I could have been alive during the first part of the century so I too could pour alcohol down a drain with reckless abandonment. Thanks, Iowa!
















I'd perfected my form by the second bottle.
















Ol' Fridgy threw me a curveball with this funny shaped potent potable. I struggled at first with this box . . .
















Until I realized Box was only a bag in disguise. Easy pouring from that point forward.

















I even had to pour out the prune juice to prove to myself this wasn't some vendetta against wines and spirits.
















"I said son can you play me a memory, I'm not really sure how it goes. But I'm pretty sure it's about me wallowing over my predictability, as I cried over spilling out milk." -- Billy Joel
















The End.